The Smell of Death
The second of the revisions for my story
So, basically what I did was differently from “The love I never got” Story was, I added some news scenes revolving around the mean boyfriend of the lead female character to show just how arrogant he is. That way he plays a bigger role in the story than we know. This is from the second paragraph: I remembered the day I first met Allison. It was orientation day in late August, three years earlier. At the time, I still had a slight stammer since I was nervous, but nothing like the stutter that had plagued me through junior high. Like most people who suffer through junior high, I was a little insecure. I had a good job and a few good friends like Jesse and Lawrence; We spent a lot of time playing video games together and role-playing games. I would also spend time at Barnes and Noble reading books about Astronomy and galaxies since I was always curious about them. These were the type of things that Thomas Storm would charac...
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